I’m actually not talking about false accusations. I agree that these are rare. Rather, what I’m suggesting is closer to what some women have called “grey-area rape.” That is, that men, who otherwise mean well, are unintentionally crossing the line from consent to non-consent. Given the widespread nature of harassment and rape this is likely happening a lot. But let’s suppose, as I suspect you will, that you deny the existence of such a concept.

So what would it really take to teach men not to be entitled to women’s bodies or to be attracted by beauty? You want to end patriarchy? How exactly, would you propose to do that? How does capitalism play into this? Please don’t tell me that you want to end this thing called “patriarchy” but you have no problem with well-paid female CEOs.

As I’ve argued elsewhere with you, patriarchy and capitalism are essentially the same thing — both treat people like disposable objects. Capitalism certainly treats lower status men as disposable objects, and if harassment and rape are something that men do to women, then if you want to end or reduce these then you need to redirect at least some of your anger at the system of patriarchy to anger at a system that teaches men that they are merely the objects of higher-status men.

It would be nice if women weren’t participants in the capitalist system of objectification, but they are. I was just reading this morning on Medium an article called: How to Get Ridiculously Rich Without Having Sex. “Paypigs” are a thing, apparently. Some good number of women don’t seem to have a problem with this. I really, really want to get rid of the patriarchy. I’m assuming you do as well. Articles like that one feel into patriarchy at full-tilt. How about taking some of that self-righteousness directed at me, and send it to the women who support this kind of shit?

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Professor, sometime poet, working in education and father to a daughter and son. Live in beautiful and sometimes smoky Vancouver, BC.

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